tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25161345181513490872024-03-08T02:38:51.291-08:00The Extent of Boredom.Frankiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03806712242875007043noreply@blogger.comBlogger15125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2516134518151349087.post-56598910087797546552011-02-14T20:24:00.000-08:002011-02-14T20:29:40.801-08:00Holy Shit.<div align="center"><img border="0" alt="Holy Shit" src="http://www.maremartell.com/Holy-shit.gif"width="400"/></div>Frankiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03806712242875007043noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2516134518151349087.post-82310785024538856702010-09-23T13:42:00.000-07:002010-09-23T13:45:03.612-07:00The Best Day Ever.<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TJu8CLhYaaI/AAAAAAAAAeM/1NjQGxD9AKA/s1600/1.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5520212513911237026" border="0" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TJu8CLhYaaI/AAAAAAAAAeM/1NjQGxD9AKA/s400/1.jpg" /></a><br /><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TJu7-trEwII/AAAAAAAAAeE/hwhIjDaPKgY/s1600/2.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5520212454359220354" border="0" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TJu7-trEwII/AAAAAAAAAeE/hwhIjDaPKgY/s400/2.jpg" /></a><br /><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TJu7-WUN-ZI/AAAAAAAAAd8/NPAzBNP8tU4/s1600/3.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5520212448089340306" border="0" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TJu7-WUN-ZI/AAAAAAAAAd8/NPAzBNP8tU4/s400/3.jpg" /></a><br /><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TJu7-BQS3rI/AAAAAAAAAd0/z5H_aq4OcTQ/s1600/4.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5520212442435739314" border="0" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TJu7-BQS3rI/AAAAAAAAAd0/z5H_aq4OcTQ/s400/4.jpg" /></a><br /><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TJu799Q685I/AAAAAAAAAds/fyqLa6GAoqM/s1600/5.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5520212441364624274" border="0" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TJu799Q685I/AAAAAAAAAds/fyqLa6GAoqM/s400/5.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br />The next morning...<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TJu79uqfmMI/AAAAAAAAAdk/TVLk4Lz5Uoc/s1600/6.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5520212437445351618" border="0" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TJu79uqfmMI/AAAAAAAAAdk/TVLk4Lz5Uoc/s400/6.jpg" /></a>Frankiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03806712242875007043noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2516134518151349087.post-83699045248742489822010-09-13T15:14:00.001-07:002010-09-13T15:22:52.354-07:00Don't Make Eye Contact.You sit on the toilet, enjoying yourself.<br />You can feel your cat staring at you.<br />Waiting...<br /><br /><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 246px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5516525408970105714" border="0" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TI6iobQUY3I/AAAAAAAAAcY/zA_z9uyCNwI/s400/1.jpg" />You know you shouldn't, but you make eye contact anyway.<br /><br /><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TI6inyd-V6I/AAAAAAAAAcQ/Qee8Vj1wGFI/s1600/2.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 246px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5516525398021527458" border="0" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TI6inyd-V6I/AAAAAAAAAcQ/Qee8Vj1wGFI/s400/2.jpg" /></a>She takes this as an invitation to come and sit on you.<br /><br /><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TI6igxcoFLI/AAAAAAAAAcI/wyHKqk52lww/s1600/3.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5516525277488354482" border="0" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TI6igxcoFLI/AAAAAAAAAcI/wyHKqk52lww/s400/3.jpg" /></a>And you know what's about to happen.<br />But there is nothing you can do to stop this.<br /><br /><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TI6igCP_avI/AAAAAAAAAcA/nh0xAs_hZSI/s1600/4.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5516525264818891506" border="0" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TI6igCP_avI/AAAAAAAAAcA/nh0xAs_hZSI/s400/4.jpg" /></a><br /><div align="center"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TI6if-6tHRI/AAAAAAAAAb4/kgYkmDtr34Y/s1600/5.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5516525263924305170" border="0" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TI6if-6tHRI/AAAAAAAAAb4/kgYkmDtr34Y/s400/5.jpg" /></a><span style="font-size:78%;">"Hey, Mom!"</span></div><br />And she will always miss...<br /><br /><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TI6ifnJMgKI/AAAAAAAAAbw/x9e-mwnn55c/s1600/6.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5516525257542631586" border="0" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TI6ifnJMgKI/AAAAAAAAAbw/x9e-mwnn55c/s400/6.jpg" /></a><br /><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TI6ifCOusrI/AAAAAAAAAbo/46gSxqSxYqQ/s1600/7.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5516525247633732274" border="0" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TI6ifCOusrI/AAAAAAAAAbo/46gSxqSxYqQ/s400/7.jpg" /></a>Frankiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03806712242875007043noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2516134518151349087.post-69092496288664726382010-09-08T20:13:00.000-07:002010-09-08T20:40:09.178-07:00You Just Ruined My Whole Day.Every guy that tries to hit on me always asks me what kind of music I like.<br /><br />I'll be having a wonderful time when they approach.<br /><br /><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TIhRofg7nII/AAAAAAAAAbg/bA0ncaa1AeM/s1600/1lovely.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5514747499811413122" border="0" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TIhRofg7nII/AAAAAAAAAbg/bA0ncaa1AeM/s400/1lovely.jpg" /></a><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TIhRntxCbLI/AAAAAAAAAbY/1zjqvfgGEoE/s1600/2inlove.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5514747486457195698" border="0" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TIhRntxCbLI/AAAAAAAAAbY/1zjqvfgGEoE/s400/2inlove.jpg" /></a><br />I can see the thought quivering through their brain as they approach me.<br />I know the question is coming.<br /><br /><div align="center"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TIhRnVKmNnI/AAAAAAAAAbQ/A8WEho1toFM/s1600/3zombie.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 203px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5514747479853512306" border="0" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TIhRnVKmNnI/AAAAAAAAAbQ/A8WEho1toFM/s400/3zombie.jpg" /></a><span style="font-size:78%;">"Huhhh...I'm going to ask you about music because I have nothing going for me..."</span></div><div align="center"> </div><br />I despise this question, because I honestly don't have a favorite, and I listen to such a wide variety of music.<br /><br />So, they usually just tell me what kind of music they like.<br />And it's always horrible music.<br />It makes them so mad because I don't like their shitty music.<br /><br /><br />For example, I hate what "alternative rock" has become.<br />It's like 500 bands with the same members playing under different names.<br /><br /><p><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 215px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5514747417741966418" border="0" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TIhRjtyDPFI/AAAAAAAAAbI/-KMpWQ9-hGY/s400/4alternative.jpg" /></p><p>I don't like death metal either.<br />I imagine that they are really tender hearted on the inside.</p><p>And it just makes them seem whiny.<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TIhRgYeP1AI/AAAAAAAAAbA/DmZ7YTjExNI/s1600/5death.jpg"></p><p><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 371px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 375px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5514747360482153474" border="0" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TIhRgYeP1AI/AAAAAAAAAbA/DmZ7YTjExNI/s400/5death.jpg" /></a></p><p>Now, I will admit that I do like some rap music.<br />But only a very small variety of rap.</p><p>What I really hate, is when gangstas leave their running vehicles unattended with rap music blaring.<br />And the bass is so high that it sounds like their car is taking a really intense dump.<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TIhRPgH_YMI/AAAAAAAAAaQ/83dOY2sS0aE/s1600/6shitnigga.jpg"></p><p><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 231px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5514747070478508226" border="0" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TIhRPgH_YMI/AAAAAAAAAaQ/83dOY2sS0aE/s400/6shitnigga.jpg" /></a></p><p>Now, one band that I really, <strong><em>really</em></strong> hate is Metallica.</p><p>They were wrong for complaining about not making money because of the whole Napster ordeal.<br />No one was buying their music in the first place.</p><p><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TIhRKY6tIVI/AAAAAAAAAaI/oH5wwodXqAA/s1600/7Fags.jpg"> </p><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 298px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5514746982644392274" border="0" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TIhRKY6tIVI/AAAAAAAAAaI/oH5wwodXqAA/s400/7Fags.jpg" /> <p align="center"></a><em><span style="font-size:85%;">See, I hate them so much I didn't even feel like actually drawing a picture of them.</span></em></p><p align="left">Another band I do not like is The Grateful Dead.</p><p align="left">I love psychedelic music. I love most music from that era.<br />But no one wants to listen to twenty minutes of hippies trippin' balls and poking around at their instruments.</p><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TIhRElrIQhI/AAAAAAAAAZ4/WhNwkTzTaqA/s1600/8jerry.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 339px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5514746882989507090" border="0" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TIhRElrIQhI/AAAAAAAAAZ4/WhNwkTzTaqA/s400/8jerry.jpg" /></a>Frankiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03806712242875007043noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2516134518151349087.post-77629016441281268432010-08-30T18:52:00.000-07:002010-09-03T17:37:46.469-07:00The Plastics Factory.I recently started working in a plastics factory.<br />The kind that makes highly disturbing medical equipment.<br />Like blood sucking devices and bins to hold body parts.<br /><br />Most of the people I work with are nice.<br /><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">(Note: The names in this post have been changed to protect the innocent.)</span><br /><br />Here, we have <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">Moby</span>. My work <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">BFF</span>.<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/THxhrAokD2I/AAAAAAAAAS4/cRh7QDl_nxc/s1600/work.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5511387435527049058" border="0" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/THxhrAokD2I/AAAAAAAAAS4/cRh7QDl_nxc/s400/work.jpg" /></a><br />And here we have, Carlo <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">Castillano</span>.<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/THxhkx759DI/AAAAAAAAASw/bPSTJpgQ6ns/s1600/work+(1).jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5511387328502428722" border="0" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/THxhkx759DI/AAAAAAAAASw/bPSTJpgQ6ns/s400/work+(1).jpg" /></a><br />My lovely boss, Rita <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">Hayworth</span>.<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/THxhkhSlKLI/AAAAAAAAASo/lnF8yHiyjD0/s1600/work+(2).jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5511387324034132146" border="0" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/THxhkhSlKLI/AAAAAAAAASo/lnF8yHiyjD0/s400/work+(2).jpg" /></a><br />And this man, Lyle. He loves Jesus.<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/THxhkXQpbAI/AAAAAAAAASg/7HBFF0_LEBs/s1600/work+(3).jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5511387321341668354" border="0" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/THxhkXQpbAI/AAAAAAAAASg/7HBFF0_LEBs/s400/work+(3).jpg" /></a><br /><br />But some of the people I work with are quite scary and sometimes weird.<br /><br />For example: Here we have <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">Pumba</span>. He babbles on constantly and no one can understand a word he says.<br />Everyone just looks to each other hoping someone caught what he said.<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/THxhjTqPxhI/AAAAAAAAASY/kOxbzTqtDt0/s1600/work+(4).jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5511387303195428370" border="0" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/THxhjTqPxhI/AAAAAAAAASY/kOxbzTqtDt0/s400/work+(4).jpg" /></a><br />And here we have, Shannon. He likes to talk about <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-error">Metallica</span> and <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" class="blsp-spelling-error">hatin</span>' blacks.<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/THxhixJLlwI/AAAAAAAAASQ/ONpCl5zF428/s1600/work+(5).jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5511387293929936642" border="0" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/THxhixJLlwI/AAAAAAAAASQ/ONpCl5zF428/s400/work+(5).jpg" /></a><br /><br />I spend most of my days at work cowering in complete terror.<br /><br /><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/THxhXVOOipI/AAAAAAAAASI/xrq5hy5qAsQ/s1600/work+(6).jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5511387097456347794" border="0" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/THxhXVOOipI/AAAAAAAAASI/xrq5hy5qAsQ/s400/work+(6).jpg" /></a><br />The machines we use are like giant, scary, metal monsters.<br />Absolutely horrifying.<br />It reminds me of being trapped in a Saw movie.<br />And those movies are terrible to begin with.<br /><br /><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/THxhXKmr8mI/AAAAAAAAASA/-NWMY4Bmy68/s1600/work+(7).jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 240px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5511387094606148194" border="0" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/THxhXKmr8mI/AAAAAAAAASA/-NWMY4Bmy68/s400/work+(7).jpg" /></a><br />They beep constantly in hunger.<br />Saying "Feed me plastic!"...."AND MORE GLUE!!"<br /><br /><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/THxhW_vi1CI/AAAAAAAAAR4/LjNP1_Qo1os/s1600/work+(8).jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5511387091690509346" border="0" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/THxhW_vi1CI/AAAAAAAAAR4/LjNP1_Qo1os/s400/work+(8).jpg" /></a><br /><br />We also have this tape machine, that I like to call 'Little David'.<br />Little David spends most of his time kicking me in the knees.<br />Once, he actually bit me on the hand.<br /><br /><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/THxhWpT4cgI/AAAAAAAAARw/qwwKnLHKlU0/s1600/work+(9).jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5511387085668905474" border="0" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/THxhWpT4cgI/AAAAAAAAARw/qwwKnLHKlU0/s400/work+(9).jpg" /></a><br /><br />And this is pretty much an actual representation of what I look like after a day of work at the plastics factory.<br /><br /><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/THxhWRkyaDI/AAAAAAAAARo/TFaqA_Gyay0/s1600/work+(10).jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5511387079297361970" border="0" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/THxhWRkyaDI/AAAAAAAAARo/TFaqA_Gyay0/s400/work+(10).jpg" /></a>Frankiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03806712242875007043noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2516134518151349087.post-11250466834214811702010-08-20T19:57:00.001-07:002010-08-20T20:25:46.763-07:00Some Good Shit.One handsome evening, my friend Javier called up to tell me that he was bringing us "some great shit".<br /><br /><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TG9A7PmFpNI/AAAAAAAAAQw/4KrC411FwIk/s1600/d1.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5507692255840150738" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TG9A7PmFpNI/AAAAAAAAAQw/4KrC411FwIk/s400/d1.jpg" border="0" /></a><br />After waking up Max to tell her the good news, we waited for Javier's arrival.<br />He showed up some while later with the goods....<br /><br /><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TG9A38oMXpI/AAAAAAAAAQo/4hhkjJ_w8HQ/s1600/d2.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5507692199209098898" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TG9A38oMXpI/AAAAAAAAAQo/4hhkjJ_w8HQ/s400/d2.jpg" border="0" /></a><br />Which turned out to be a plastic bag and a can of air duster.<br /><br />He then proceeded to inhale the air duster out of the plastic bag that he sprayed it in...<br /><br /><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TG9A37JdfgI/AAAAAAAAAQg/wLbdWD8iWPQ/s1600/d3.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5507692198811762178" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TG9A37JdfgI/AAAAAAAAAQg/wLbdWD8iWPQ/s400/d3.jpg" border="0" /></a><br />After sucking all of the substance into his lungs, he looks up at us slowly...<br />Laughing maniacally.<br />And drooling all over my carpet...<br /><br /><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TG9A3b5cjnI/AAAAAAAAAQY/qRUMSSlV3DY/s1600/d4.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5507692190423092850" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TG9A3b5cjnI/AAAAAAAAAQY/qRUMSSlV3DY/s400/d4.jpg" border="0" /></a><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TG9A3DVQWXI/AAAAAAAAAQQ/SAcApdiIz4w/s1600/d5.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5507692183828846962" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TG9A3DVQWXI/AAAAAAAAAQQ/SAcApdiIz4w/s400/d5.jpg" border="0" /></a><br />After this, we promptly showed him out the door.<br />Completely terrified and deeply <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">disappointed</span> that we didn't get any <em>real</em> "good shit".<br /><br /><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TG9A293liDI/AAAAAAAAAQI/8tbFOsdiDwc/s1600/d6.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5507692182362228786" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TG9A293liDI/AAAAAAAAAQI/8tbFOsdiDwc/s400/d6.jpg" border="0" /></a>Frankiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03806712242875007043noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2516134518151349087.post-22112571796722543592010-08-12T13:02:00.000-07:002010-08-12T13:13:50.629-07:00Cryptic Messages.Sometimes, I leave myself little notes.
<br />To remind myself of humorous things or something I wanted to write about.
<br />
<br />When I go back to read these little bits of information, I generally have no idea what I was talking about.
<br />
<br />So, I've decided to compile some of these cryptic messages and illustrate them with what I can only assume that they meant.
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />"Riding a motorbike...Cats having sex..."
<br /><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRTm8syLzI/AAAAAAAAAOg/aq-nnNF0dWw/s1600/notes.jpg">
<br /><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRTm8syLzI/AAAAAAAAAOg/aq-nnNF0dWw/s1600/notes.jpg"><p><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5504616573147688754" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRTm8syLzI/AAAAAAAAAOg/aq-nnNF0dWw/s400/notes.jpg" border="0" /></a><span style="font-size:78%;">(Side note: My boyfriend claims that my motorbike looks like an angry horned sparrow with an under-developed wing, that just got back from a frat party and is throwing up an additional arm...)</span></p><p>"Photography, cow eyes, Playboy magazines."
<br /></p><p><span style="font-size:78%;"></span><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRTjKaj1yI/AAAAAAAAAOY/-SKYvzHSAi0/s1600/notes2.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5504616508109870882" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRTjKaj1yI/AAAAAAAAAOY/-SKYvzHSAi0/s400/notes2.jpg" border="0" /></a></p><p>"CAT SHIT!!!"
<br />
<br /><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRTi4kWl1I/AAAAAAAAAOQ/TBPveUDrwZY/s1600/notes5.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5504616503319107410" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRTi4kWl1I/AAAAAAAAAOQ/TBPveUDrwZY/s400/notes5.jpg" border="0" /></a></p><p>"I have to reconstruct her breasts from scratch with Bisquick."
<br /></p><p><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRTiUGXWSI/AAAAAAAAAOI/xxVOilcQ_ZY/s1600/notes3.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5504616493529651490" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRTiUGXWSI/AAAAAAAAAOI/xxVOilcQ_ZY/s400/notes3.jpg" border="0" /></a></p><p>"Looking in the doctor's bag... Unsatisfactory!"</p><p><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRTiPaitaI/AAAAAAAAAOA/E_RsVwgJOL4/s1600/Notes6.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5504616492272104866" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRTiPaitaI/AAAAAAAAAOA/E_RsVwgJOL4/s400/Notes6.jpg" border="0" /></a></p><p>"Dr. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Quinne</span> Medicine Bitch"</p><p><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRThwI5euI/AAAAAAAAAN4/VDZznu4ZxFQ/s1600/notes4.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5504616483876600546" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRThwI5euI/AAAAAAAAAN4/VDZznu4ZxFQ/s400/notes4.jpg" border="0" /></a></p>Frankiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03806712242875007043noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2516134518151349087.post-26539392130298561902010-08-12T00:29:00.000-07:002010-08-12T00:30:34.398-07:00Belly Bumps.<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGOi9mP9Q2I/AAAAAAAAANI/IAbZUnxmdm0/s1600/Velveeta.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5504422348700074850" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGOi9mP9Q2I/AAAAAAAAANI/IAbZUnxmdm0/s400/Velveeta.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGOi9muCnaI/AAAAAAAAANA/qBo8O7gggIo/s1600/Velveeta2.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5504422348826254754" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGOi9muCnaI/AAAAAAAAANA/qBo8O7gggIo/s400/Velveeta2.jpg" border="0" /></a>Frankiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03806712242875007043noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2516134518151349087.post-61926897796288788452010-07-29T15:53:00.000-07:002010-07-29T16:46:57.775-07:00Are you cool?A few years ago, I went on a cross country road trip with my grandparents.
<br />We stopped in at a cousin's house who I hadn't seen since I was around five.
<br />
<br />I was sitting in her room with her, when she asks:
<br />
<br />
<br /><p><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIHiFR9QKI/AAAAAAAAALY/aVFwRnFjKiY/s1600/JESUS!!1.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499466377087238306" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIHiFR9QKI/AAAAAAAAALY/aVFwRnFjKiY/s400/JESUS!!1.jpg" border="0" /></a><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIHiH3e7pI/AAAAAAAAALQ/lQ5rQHphBD4/s1600/JESUS!!2.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499466377781505682" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIHiH3e7pI/AAAAAAAAALQ/lQ5rQHphBD4/s400/JESUS!!2.jpg" border="0" /></a></p><p>She asks again, "No, are you COOL?"
<br />Blank stare...
<br />
<br />"Do you smoke!?"
<br />"Oh! Sure.."
<br />
<br />So, we get into her truck and partake as she barrels down tiny backroads in the middle of a forest.
<br />After a while she asks, "DO YOU KNOW WHERE WE ARE?"
<br /><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIHa94l_1I/AAAAAAAAAK4/x3A4Dln5Z98/s1600/JESUS!!3.jpg">
<br /><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIHa94l_1I/AAAAAAAAAK4/x3A4Dln5Z98/s1600/JESUS!!3.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499466254842724178" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIHa94l_1I/AAAAAAAAAK4/x3A4Dln5Z98/s400/JESUS!!3.jpg" border="0" /></a></p><p>I'm sure I had the look of utmost terror on my face.
<br /></p><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIHaq8kXsI/AAAAAAAAAKw/mHY-AxvFp28/s1600/JESUS!!4.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499466249759121090" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIHaq8kXsI/AAAAAAAAAKw/mHY-AxvFp28/s400/JESUS!!4.jpg" border="0" /></a> <p>She just laughed as she continued driving.
<br />Shortly thereafter, we stopped to pick up two of her friends.</p>
<br /><p>Who turned out to be Tweedledee and Tweedledum...<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIHaFTw2qI/AAAAAAAAAKo/OsEKlcfHbnY/s1600/JESUS!!5.jpg"></p></a><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIHaFTw2qI/AAAAAAAAAKo/OsEKlcfHbnY/s1600/JESUS!!5.jpg"><p><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499466239655860898" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIHaFTw2qI/AAAAAAAAAKo/OsEKlcfHbnY/s400/JESUS!!5.jpg" border="0" /></a></p><p>She then took us all to the lake.
<br />I stood with my feet in the water for a long while practicing karate moves...</p><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIHGEx8oQI/AAAAAAAAAKg/oDviWape4aQ/s1600/JESUS!!6.jpg"><p><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499465895916642562" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIHGEx8oQI/AAAAAAAAAKg/oDviWape4aQ/s400/JESUS!!6.jpg" border="0" /></a></p><p>Until I look across the lake to see Jesus, arms spread walking towards me.</p><p><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIHF0gGDOI/AAAAAAAAAKY/rBhKxHMi8Pg/s1600/JESUS!!7.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499465891546795234" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIHF0gGDOI/AAAAAAAAAKY/rBhKxHMi8Pg/s400/JESUS!!7.jpg" border="0" /></a><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIHFh1R8KI/AAAAAAAAAKQ/-pVKVl7uL3s/s1600/JESUS!!8.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499465886535381154" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIHFh1R8KI/AAAAAAAAAKQ/-pVKVl7uL3s/s400/JESUS!!8.jpg" border="0" /></a></p><p>I turn around frantically looking for help, to see Tweedledee and Tweedledum bobbing around.</p><p><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIG2Sym1cI/AAAAAAAAAJ4/WOhfqSUk9mY/s1600/JESUS!!5.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499465624799598018" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIG2Sym1cI/AAAAAAAAAJ4/WOhfqSUk9mY/s400/JESUS!!5.jpg" border="0" /></a><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIG2EptvVI/AAAAAAAAAJw/lRG1kjUGBM8/s1600/JESUS!!8.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499465621004205394" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIG2EptvVI/AAAAAAAAAJw/lRG1kjUGBM8/s400/JESUS!!8.jpg" border="0" /></a></p><p>I decided to make a run for the truck, until I noticed that it had turned into a giant turkey.</p><p><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIG1xBeu3I/AAAAAAAAAJo/KoD6EqXoFM0/s1600/JESUS!!9.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499465615735176050" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIG1xBeu3I/AAAAAAAAAJo/KoD6EqXoFM0/s400/JESUS!!9.jpg" border="0" /></a><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIGk-IITeI/AAAAAAAAAJg/v-Qsy37wVL4/s1600/JESUS!!10.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499465327194951138" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIGk-IITeI/AAAAAAAAAJg/v-Qsy37wVL4/s400/JESUS!!10.jpg" border="0" /></a></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Eventually I was coaxed into the truck and my cousin dropped me back off at the hotel we were staying at.
<br />It was probably after midnight.</p><p>My Grandpa opens the door and immediately asks:</p><p>"Have you been smoking those funny cigarettes?"
<br /></p><p><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499477109194734210" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIRSxfxuoI/AAAAAAAAAL4/N7F6lrtpt4c/s400/JESUS!!11.jpg" border="0" /><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499476858051051554" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFIREJ6dQCI/AAAAAAAAALw/qYwIBmotbWI/s400/JESUS!!12.jpg" border="0" /></p>
<br />Frankiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03806712242875007043noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2516134518151349087.post-15368288791309581932010-07-28T23:23:00.000-07:002010-07-28T23:57:27.333-07:00The Alaskan Rainforest.A long while ago, Max and I decided to delve into the depths of mescaline.
<br />
<br />We drank a lovely tea concoction of the stuff, which was pretty much like drinking a hot cup of boogers.
<br />After consumption, we decided to venture out into the parking lot of my apartment building.
<br />We gazed at the lovliness of the day.
<br />The birds were singing. The grass was chirping.
<br /><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFEgIjrJhVI/AAAAAAAAAIo/JDlWg_BK8u8/s1600/Mesc1.jpg">
<br /><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFEgIjrJhVI/AAAAAAAAAIo/JDlWg_BK8u8/s1600/Mesc1.jpg"><p><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499211951383348562" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFEgIjrJhVI/AAAAAAAAAIo/JDlWg_BK8u8/s400/Mesc1.jpg" border="0" /></p><p></a>It was only a while before there was a gigantic swarm of crane flies, which we thought were trying to get in our mouths and lay eggs inside of our bellies.
<br />
<br />This resulted in us running and screaming through the parking lot in broad daylight.<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFEgICBVygI/AAAAAAAAAIg/eqgwetg6NSQ/s1600/Mesc2.jpg"></p><p><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499211942349621762" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFEgICBVygI/AAAAAAAAAIg/eqgwetg6NSQ/s400/Mesc2.jpg" border="0" /></a></p><p>We decided to go back inside so as not to frighten our very timid Asian neighbors any more than we already had.</p><p><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFEgH1lHxeI/AAAAAAAAAIY/hD6UahX0YcQ/s1600/Mesc3.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499211939010037218" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFEgH1lHxeI/AAAAAAAAAIY/hD6UahX0YcQ/s400/Mesc3.jpg" border="0" /></a></p><p>Quickly becoming bored, we decided to paint pictures.
<br />And quickly becoming bored of this, we decided to get naked and paint our entire bodies with a multitude of colorful paint.</p><p><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFEgHr2ofUI/AAAAAAAAAIQ/Gg5bo-lDZGo/s1600/Mesc4.jpg"> </p><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499211936399129922" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFEgHr2ofUI/AAAAAAAAAIQ/Gg5bo-lDZGo/s400/Mesc4.jpg" border="0" /></a> <p>By the time we were finished with painting and then clogging my shower with 800 gallons of acrylic paint, we decided it was time to go to the store for cigarettes. At three o'clock in the morning.
<br />
<br />As we were driving the entire one mile to the gas station, Max kept asking me "Are we driving through mud?"
<br />I wasn't really sure.
<br />
<br />As we pulled up to the gas station, I decided we needed a game plan. I looked over at Max and said "Don't even open your mouth. Just don't say anything."
<br />
<br />As soon as we step out the car and strange man starts yelling at us about our beautifully colored hairs.
<br />So Max replies "We are SO NOT FUCKED UP RIGHT NOW!"
<br />The man decides to follow us into the gas station picking at our hair and screaming.</p><p><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFEgHOEIG_I/AAAAAAAAAII/2ikLeTJdLYg/s1600/Mesc5.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499211928402664434" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFEgHOEIG_I/AAAAAAAAAII/2ikLeTJdLYg/s400/Mesc5.jpg" border="0" /></a></p><p>After what seems like an hour of this man poking and prodding us, we arrive at the counter.
<br />The man just stares at us, to which Max replies:
<br />"I THOUGHT YOUR NAMETAG SAID COCAINE!"</p><p><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFEf9g01K9I/AAAAAAAAAIA/RaYx1ZZwNzQ/s1600/Mesc6.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499211761640090578" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFEf9g01K9I/AAAAAAAAAIA/RaYx1ZZwNzQ/s400/Mesc6.jpg" border="0" /></a><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFEf9WtpWtI/AAAAAAAAAH4/fywOjMRUwhg/s1600/Mesc7.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499211758925601490" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFEf9WtpWtI/AAAAAAAAAH4/fywOjMRUwhg/s400/Mesc7.jpg" border="0" /></a></p><p>I tried to shush her as I ordered my cigarettes.
<br />As I am completing the transaction, I hear "THEY ARE SO BEAUTIFUL!!!"<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFEf8xg_X7I/AAAAAAAAAHw/_OOA7b8Dfmo/s1600/Mesc8.jpg"></p><p><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499211748940406706" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFEf8xg_X7I/AAAAAAAAAHw/_OOA7b8Dfmo/s400/Mesc8.jpg" border="0" /></a></p><p>I look over and witness Max staring into a basket of fruit...</p><p><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFEf8vmR3DI/AAAAAAAAAHo/KbCdRbL6Xs0/s1600/Mesc9.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499211748425718834" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFEf8vmR3DI/AAAAAAAAAHo/KbCdRbL6Xs0/s400/Mesc9.jpg" border="0" /></a></p><p>I grab her and run out of the store while she is screaming "I NEED CIGARETTES!"</p><p>
<br />I get in the car and tell her we have to go somewhere else because I am pretty sure the gas station attendant thinks we are criminally insane.
<br />
<br />So, we then try to locate another gas station. When we finally find one, I tell Max she must go in this time by herself because I can't deal with it.
<br />
<br />She wanders aimlessly through the gas station as I watch her through the windows. She somehow gets side tracked by the Slushie machine and decides she must have one....
<br />But not before staring at and touching the condensation on the machine first...
<br />For about ten minutes.</p><p>
<br />We spent the rest of the night naked on the couch staring into each other's eyes and believing we were in the middle of a war zone.<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFEf8Qt7ZGI/AAAAAAAAAHg/ZTaS_uv2--M/s1600/Mesc10.jpg"></p><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5499211740136301666" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TFEf8Qt7ZGI/AAAAAAAAAHg/ZTaS_uv2--M/s400/Mesc10.jpg" border="0" /></a>Frankiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03806712242875007043noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2516134518151349087.post-87967002909775119892010-07-23T21:53:00.001-07:002010-07-23T22:43:58.609-07:00Did You Hear Gunshots?<div align="left">Once, after a friend and I partook in inhaling some elevation substances, we took a lovely stroll through the neighborhood late in the evening.</div><div align="left"><br />As we were walking along, there were a million helicopters circling overhead.</div><div align="left">Shining their spotlights on us, making us cringe away in fear.</div><div align="left">I was pretty sure we were being abducted by aliens.</div><br /><div align="left"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpywYdaQsI/AAAAAAAAAGQ/ltQxzS3kKCU/s1600/Gunshots+1.jpg"></div></a><br /><p align="left"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5497332470684205762" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpywYdaQsI/AAAAAAAAAGQ/ltQxzS3kKCU/s400/Gunshots+1.jpg" border="0" /></p><br /><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpywYdaQsI/AAAAAAAAAGQ/ltQxzS3kKCU/s1600/Gunshots+1.jpg"><p align="left"></a></p><br /><p align="left">Some while later, a policeman drives up to us while we are staring at the sky like retarded zombies.</p><br /><div align="left"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5497332410181270914" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpys3EYvYI/AAAAAAAAAGI/Dmo3wK6JoUU/s400/Gunshots+2.jpg" border="0" /></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left">He rolls down the window and asks:</div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpyoZfTzLI/AAAAAAAAAGA/OVEvoutHnoY/s1600/Gunshots+3.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5497332333521652914" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpyoZfTzLI/AAAAAAAAAGA/OVEvoutHnoY/s400/Gunshots+3.jpg" border="0" /></a><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpylBZw5gI/AAAAAAAAAF4/Anrf_X53K1o/s1600/Gunshots+4.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5497332275516335618" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpylBZw5gI/AAAAAAAAAF4/Anrf_X53K1o/s400/Gunshots+4.jpg" border="0" /></a><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpyhZNOT5I/AAAAAAAAAFw/wO2qabEQCCk/s1600/Gunshots+5.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5497332213186711442" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpyhZNOT5I/AAAAAAAAAFw/wO2qabEQCCk/s400/Gunshots+5.jpg" border="0" /></a></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left">After a monumental stare down between the officer and us...</div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5497341743776316994" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEp7MJa2vkI/AAAAAAAAAGY/kCkzxzbsBMM/s400/Gunshots+6.jpg" border="0" /><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5497332084994095394" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpyZ7puOSI/AAAAAAAAAFg/d2-mH-Rpp8I/s400/Gunshots+7.jpg" border="0" /><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpyVTz7idI/AAAAAAAAAFY/Yl4inYf7RE0/s1600/Gunshots+8.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5497332005580016082" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpyVTz7idI/AAAAAAAAAFY/Yl4inYf7RE0/s400/Gunshots+8.jpg" border="0" /></a><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpyO_FcaSI/AAAAAAAAAFQ/Zez39cIx5qc/s1600/Gunshots+3.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5497331896937113890" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpyO_FcaSI/AAAAAAAAAFQ/Zez39cIx5qc/s400/Gunshots+3.jpg" border="0" /></a><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpyHcxgygI/AAAAAAAAAFI/TTNy93TEROQ/s1600/Gunshots+9.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5497331767467624962" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpyHcxgygI/AAAAAAAAAFI/TTNy93TEROQ/s400/Gunshots+9.jpg" border="0" /></a><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpyDiN5mCI/AAAAAAAAAFA/Rwly7q3jB_g/s1600/Gunshots+10.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5497331700209391650" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpyDiN5mCI/AAAAAAAAAFA/Rwly7q3jB_g/s400/Gunshots+10.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /></div><div><div><div><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpx_4s8lwI/AAAAAAAAAE4/XZSKQEDqEvg/s1600/Gunshots+11.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5497331637525714690" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpx_4s8lwI/AAAAAAAAAE4/XZSKQEDqEvg/s400/Gunshots+11.jpg" border="0" /></a><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpx8cas26I/AAAAAAAAAEw/ujsULIoHIjU/s1600/Gunshots+12.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5497331578393385890" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpx8cas26I/AAAAAAAAAEw/ujsULIoHIjU/s400/Gunshots+12.jpg" border="0" /></a></div><div><div><div><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpx4OewHtI/AAAAAAAAAEo/0Qy5_zsb5zo/s1600/Gunshots+13.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5497331505932803794" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpx4OewHtI/AAAAAAAAAEo/0Qy5_zsb5zo/s400/Gunshots+13.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><br /></div><br /><div><br /><br /><div><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpx0U049qI/AAAAAAAAAEg/Hbv0iDD4VeM/s1600/Gunshots+14.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5497331438916794018" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TEpx0U049qI/AAAAAAAAAEg/Hbv0iDD4VeM/s400/Gunshots+14.jpg" border="0" /></a></div></div></div></div></div></div>Frankiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03806712242875007043noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2516134518151349087.post-56278818999509853352010-06-23T17:21:00.000-07:002010-06-23T21:28:48.694-07:00At the Gay Bar.I recently went bar-hopping with my mother.<br />Somehow during the night we ended up dancing at a gay bar.<br /><br />Now, when I dance at bars, I get really into it. And by really into it, I mean I dance like the biggest moron on the planet.<br />For some reason, drunk people just think I am the most amazing dancer in the universe.<br /><br /><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCKmJWWFp5I/AAAAAAAAADE/VvVvaYpTAbg/s1600/gay+bar+1.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5486129975637944210" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCKmJWWFp5I/AAAAAAAAADE/VvVvaYpTAbg/s400/gay+bar+1.jpg" border="0" /></a><br />Now, keep in mind, that I've also had quite a few PBRs throughout the evening and anyone who drinks this gloriously cheap beer should know, that it gives you some pretty intense stinky ass bombs.<br /><br /><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCKmGC12O7I/AAAAAAAAAC8/uBVT9OQ-Unc/s1600/gay+bar+2.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5486129918862834610" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCKmGC12O7I/AAAAAAAAAC8/uBVT9OQ-Unc/s400/gay+bar+2.jpg" border="0" /></a><br />So, this very petite little gay boy decides to start dancing around me.<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCKmC3OZS_I/AAAAAAAAAC0/RKnd6RE0hZY/s1600/gay+bar+3.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5486129864204962802" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCKmC3OZS_I/AAAAAAAAAC0/RKnd6RE0hZY/s400/gay+bar+3.jpg" border="0" /></a><br />After a while we start inching closer and the next thing I know, he is on his knees dancing with HIS FACE SHOVED IN MY CROTCH!<br /><br /><div><div><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCKl-SvHRAI/AAAAAAAAACs/WfaiLnPeeis/s1600/gay+bar+4.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5486129785690604546" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCKl-SvHRAI/AAAAAAAAACs/WfaiLnPeeis/s400/gay+bar+4.jpg" border="0" /></a><br />I was so drunk at that point that I didn't even give a shit.<br />Except that by now my ass was billowing out noxious fart winds and filling the entire dance floor with a beautiful aroma...<br /><br />He didn't seem to mind. He just kept right on dancing with his nose right up in my vagina.<br /><br /><br /><div><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCKl5qVLBkI/AAAAAAAAACk/rlFPjp0XZuE/s1600/gay+bar+5.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5486129706124904002" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCKl5qVLBkI/AAAAAAAAACk/rlFPjp0XZuE/s400/gay+bar+5.jpg" border="0" /></a><br />Afterwards, my mother and I were in a gas station parking lot screeching at four in the morning and cramming square mini-burgers into our mouths...<br />She said "Man, that dance floor kinda smelled kinda bad."<br />And I drunkenly scream-whispered back "YEAH, BECAUSE I WAS RIPPING ASS ALL OVER THE DAMN DANCE FLOOR!"<br /><br /><div><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCKlymikA4I/AAAAAAAAACc/PcHDj_ZMCfo/s1600/Gay+bar+6.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5486129584848241538" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCKlymikA4I/AAAAAAAAACc/PcHDj_ZMCfo/s400/Gay+bar+6.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><div></div></div></div></div></div>Frankiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03806712242875007043noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2516134518151349087.post-64055356288801475512010-06-23T06:43:00.000-07:002010-06-22T18:47:48.110-07:00A True Story.<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCFm7vKSCcI/AAAAAAAAACU/8kDEQPRZgBo/s1600/gyne+1.bmp"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5485778997571881410" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCFm7vKSCcI/AAAAAAAAACU/8kDEQPRZgBo/s400/gyne+1.bmp" border="0" /></a><br /><div align="center"><span style="font-size:180%;">...<br /></span></div><div align="center"><span style="font-size:180%;"></div></span><div></div><div><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCFm2dNMYqI/AAAAAAAAACM/0YlR1vmREM8/s1600/gyne+2.bmp"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5485778906852909730" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCFm2dNMYqI/AAAAAAAAACM/0YlR1vmREM8/s400/gyne+2.bmp" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><div></div></div>Frankiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03806712242875007043noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2516134518151349087.post-79126475963397441322010-06-22T12:26:00.000-07:002010-06-22T12:40:55.318-07:00Hashbrowns.Sometimes, I get so frustrated that my brain just shuts down and my caveman instincts take over.<br /><br />A good example of this happened during an outing at a popular breakfast hangout with my full-on <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">compadre</span>, Max.<br />She was trying to pepper her <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">hashbrowns</span>.<br />And it absolutely drives me insane that the pepper holes on a pepper shaker are that small.<br /><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCEPE7Kf7xI/AAAAAAAAACE/rdwW-dtDgq4/s1600/hashbrowns+1.bmp"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5485682398389595922" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 208px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCEPE7Kf7xI/AAAAAAAAACE/rdwW-dtDgq4/s400/hashbrowns+1.bmp" border="0" /></a><br />It fills me with such a rage, that sometimes I just throw up right there.<br /><br /><div><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCEPAm25I_I/AAAAAAAAAB8/crIW-JZF5Uc/s1600/hashbrowns+2.bmp"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5485682324219175922" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 208px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCEPAm25I_I/AAAAAAAAAB8/crIW-JZF5Uc/s400/hashbrowns+2.bmp" border="0" /></a><br />Well, this particular time, I decided to show Max, that if you just unscrew that cap, you can pour the pepper much quicker, thus saving lots of time.<br /><br /><div><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCEO8SExOdI/AAAAAAAAAB0/fPvvQ_skpYk/s1600/hashbrowns+3.bmp"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5485682249920756178" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 208px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCEO8SExOdI/AAAAAAAAAB0/fPvvQ_skpYk/s400/hashbrowns+3.bmp" border="0" /></a><br />This resulted in Max dumping about 8 pounds of pepper onto her <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">hashbrowns</span> at once.<br /><br /><br /><div><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCEOz3Gyx4I/AAAAAAAAABs/HI6ePwr8iKw/s1600/hashbrowns+4.bmp"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5485682105242535810" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 208px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCEOz3Gyx4I/AAAAAAAAABs/HI6ePwr8iKw/s400/hashbrowns+4.bmp" border="0" /></a><br />I assured her that it would be okay. All I needed to do, was stir around her <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">hashbrowns</span> around.</div><div>...With my fingers.<br /><br /><br /><br /><div><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCEOvY3nyAI/AAAAAAAAABk/-dFgO4kLpGc/s1600/hashbrowns+5.bmp"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5485682028406360066" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 208px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCEOvY3nyAI/AAAAAAAAABk/-dFgO4kLpGc/s400/hashbrowns+5.bmp" border="0" /></a><br /><div><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCEOrfuK8CI/AAAAAAAAABc/7XKBmrg7dmQ/s1600/hashbrowns+6.bmp"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5485681961526292514" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 208px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TCEOrfuK8CI/AAAAAAAAABc/7XKBmrg7dmQ/s400/hashbrowns+6.bmp" border="0" /></a><br /><div></div></div></div></div></div></div>Frankiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03806712242875007043noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2516134518151349087.post-86905746682587040722010-06-21T17:07:00.000-07:002010-08-12T14:54:30.317-07:00My Soccer Career.I played soccer for a few years in elementary school. I also took ballet.
<br />I preferred ballet, so I spent most of my time doing pliƩs across the field.
<br />That's probably why they made me the "goalie protector". I think they just made that position up for me because they weren't sure if I was mentally challenged or not.
<br />
<br /><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRrnCBW2mI/AAAAAAAAAP4/3sDtRC3SsPk/s1600/soccer1.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5504642962855221858" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRrnCBW2mI/AAAAAAAAAP4/3sDtRC3SsPk/s400/soccer1.jpg" border="0" /></a>
<br />I only made one goal during my entire soccer career.
<br />I remember somehow getting the ball and deciding that today would be the day I made a goal.
<br />I was running down the field so fast that none of the other kids even bothered trying to catch up with me.
<br />
<br /><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRrmgRAbDI/AAAAAAAAAPw/r3d7btFxiz0/s1600/soccer2.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5504642953794055218" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRrmgRAbDI/AAAAAAAAAPw/r3d7btFxiz0/s400/soccer2.jpg" border="0" /></a>
<br />As I neared the goal, everyone started going wild and cheering for me!
<br />
<br /><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRrmE6LAkI/AAAAAAAAAPo/vTSkDTU6zl8/s1600/soccer3.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5504642946450522690" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRrmE6LAkI/AAAAAAAAAPo/vTSkDTU6zl8/s400/soccer3.jpg" border="0" /></a>
<br />I waved at all of my admirers as I was getting ready to kick the ball!
<br />
<br /><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRrlv0SDKI/AAAAAAAAAPg/gJJEqF-WDro/s1600/soccer4.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5504642940788673698" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRrlv0SDKI/AAAAAAAAAPg/gJJEqF-WDro/s400/soccer4.jpg" border="0" /></a>
<br />I kicked the ball into the goal with such ferocious intensity, that the goalie just jumped out of the way!
<br />
<br />I was so happy that I made my first goal!
<br /><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRrlTEmAxI/AAAAAAAAAPY/G3NPs5Xlz5k/s1600/soccer5.jpg">
<br /><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRrlTEmAxI/AAAAAAAAAPY/G3NPs5Xlz5k/s1600/soccer5.jpg"><p><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5504642933072462610" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRrlTEmAxI/AAAAAAAAAPY/G3NPs5Xlz5k/s400/soccer5.jpg" border="0" /></a></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Suddenly, I realized that I had actually scored for the opposing team.
<br />And those cheers were actually people trying to warn me that I was going the wrong way.</p><p><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRrd6dme8I/AAAAAAAAAPQ/w5APts6BGLc/s1600/soccer6.jpg"> </p><p><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5504642806207380418" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 203px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q7P6OmQS4E8/TGRrd6dme8I/AAAAAAAAAPQ/w5APts6BGLc/s400/soccer6.jpg" border="0" /></a></p><p>I never played soccer again.</p>Frankiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03806712242875007043noreply@blogger.com3